Updated: Jul 9, 2019
My 12 week journey to competing in my first body physique competition.
As I sit here with meal #3 of 6, long black and my 2 year old nephew who is now preoccupied with pen and paper in place of crying his eyes out, I start my first blog.
It has only just occurred to me that I have no idea what a blog is and how to get started. This has been on my bucket list for years but something, like many things. I have put off.
“ I use the term suffering as that's exactly what it feels like. Not only for the individual, but also for those around who experience this disorder second hand. ”
Now, before I get started, there are a few important things you should know and the reason behind this (some might say crazy and 'unhealthy') adventure.
I am soon to be 29, the youngest of 3 and have lived in Perth nearly 7 years. Originally from NZ, my family and I have gradually relocated ourselves to Perth.
Whilst spending the past 10 years in and out of jobs, relationships (good and bad) and various houses. I have also spent the past 10 years with a deep and deadly secret that has lead me to push people away and isolate myself from social situations and building close friendships and relationships with the people I met. A deep and deadly disorder that is not talked about nearly enough and that many people, maybe even you reading this suffers with, has suffered with or knows someone suffering.
I use the term suffering as that's exactly what it feels like. Not only for the individual, but also for those around who experience this disorder second hand.
Commonly, a disorder that goes unnoticed and easily hidden by the individual. I became a master of hiding, lying and denying this disorder for many unexplained reasons. I was always known for being so fit and healthy, having so much will power and 'having my life sorted'.... (ha yeah right).
For those who know me, may get the shock of their lives to learn about my 10 years of suffering as this is not something that is discussed often. However, on my road to recovery, I have learnt to talk about it more often as a way of moving forward and addressing my feelings and emotions instead of holding them in and suffering in silence.
So here goes, 10 years behind closed doors.....
Firstly there was the - Anorexia, an emotional disorder characterized by an obsessive desire to lose weight by refusing to eat.
Then - Bulimia, an emotional disorder characterized by a distorted body image and an obsessive desire to lose weight, in which bouts of extreme overeating are followed by fasting or self-induced vomiting or purging.
That's right, eating disorders. A complicated and unexplainable behaviour that will never be understood by anyone other than the sufferer. Our behaviour, reasoning and actions are beyond reasonable that make no sense, even to ourselves at times. With all that said, my road to recovery has been a long one with many slip ups along the way. Many might say that doing a body physique comp is feeding the disorder... yes I agree, well partly agree anyway. This time 6-12 months ago, no way would I have considered it. Physically and mentally I was not prepared. Given what I know now, I think it's a great idea. I am fueling my body with the right foods, exercising every day and being accountable to a trainer who has tailored my training and nutrition specifically for me.
To the general public, we see the end results of these competitions... hair, make up, tans, bikinis and muscles... definitely not for everyone! We forget how much hard work and dedication is involved in this type of sport/activity. Remembering that by the time these competitors get to this stage, they have shredded themselves ready for the stage. Yes, this part may not be entirely good for the body but hey, don't be to quick to judge, what questionable things have you done recently or in the past that haven't been entirely good for you??? Plus, with the right trainer, nutrition plan and attitude, pre and post competition, the body adjust back to normality very quickly with minimal side effects. Either way, the decision has been made and training has begun. Highlights, low lights, photos and updates to follow in my weekly blog posts.